Mission Accomplished: Wallpaper Desensitization

Two months after we have moved in I'm finally done hanging pictures. It being one of Aaron's very favorite pastimes, I did it all while he was at work. That wasn't hard at all because he's hardly home anyways! Ahh, the joys of being a medical resident (he's on a 30 hour shift which is now 32 and still counting). I think it took me so long because I have been systematically immunizing myself to the walls so that I could get past the fact that we have to live here, with the wallpaper, for the next three years and if I was going to hang pictures I might as well do it now. The wallpaper isn't going anywhere.

Here is the living room. While most people hang photos in their picture frames, I hang fabric swatches sewn together. I was getting a little bored with pictures of our family all over the house so I decided to improvise. Aaron made no comment. I just figure that because I was born and raised in Ashland, Oregon I have the right to decorate as eccentric as I want. After all, I grew up around hippies. Fabric on a wall isn't so bad. Actually, I saw the idea at IKEA and even though I didn't like their display much, I figured I could elaborate.

Ikea also sells super cheap picture frames which I stock up on every time I go there. See the 8x10s? Yeah, they're not 8x10. They are 8.5x11. Who does that? Oh, yes, Europeans. Sheesh. It honestly took me all afternoon to make mattes for these beauties.

NOTE: I am not discriminating against Europeans, just their idea that selling 8.5x11 picture frames is a good idea.
Home sweet ghetto. I actually really like our bedroom, the yellow wall under the rip in the wallpaper goes perfectly with the off white squares in our comforter. With the pukes stains upstairs and the rips in the wallpaper (and the blinds hanging like a loose tooth in the computer room), I really feel like we have made this place our home. And everyone who lives here after us will know that.
I'm pretty sure the kids don't ever notice the pictures that I spent so long on. What a cheery feeling. So, if you ever do stop by our wallpaper mansion in Indiana, please comment on the pictures in the boys' rooms. Thank you.
I got crazy with the watercolors because I had to somehow cover the previous nail holes in the walls of the bathroom. Come to think of it, a little Spackle would have done the trick. Oh well, more pictures to go unnoticed.

Wallpaper Extravaganza

This is a special day for you. Why? Because you are about to embark on a journey through time. To the early nineties. Yes, you are entering our home where the nostalgic varieties of wallpaper will bring back memories of your youth (or maybe not if you're older). I'm not sure what year this house was built but judging by the beauteous walls I will have to go with the late eighties or early nineties. Shall we being our tour?


Here we have the upstairs guest bedroom. The woman was seriously missing the beach because this is not the only room with sea-related decor. Maybe her husband never wanted to move to a coastal state and she was making up for it with seashell and starfish wallpaper in flat, humid, lake less Indiana. Even if I lived near the beach you would never find this in my house. Oh wait, you do. Shoot.

Next we enter Search's room, Aaron's favorite. Originally designed as a boy's bedroom, Search gets to fall asleep starting at cheerful dolphins and whales who look like they've eaten a few too many Twinkies. Not to mention the multicolored stripes on the bottom half of the wall. Well that explains why he's been so tired all the time lately! He can't fall asleep in there! Maybe I should just add some strobe lights to the mix.
Next we see the kitchen. Lucky for us we have the fourth of July all year round in here because we are constantly surrounded by "fireworks", as Destroy calls these creative brush strokes. Too bad we can't somehow show our kitchen during July instead of displaying our flag.

Here's the guest bathroom. "Look, Mom! Little fireworks!" Nothing like imagining fireworks going off as you're sitting on the throne.
This room used to be the dinning room. Seeing that we only have enough tables for one room, we use this room for the computer and piano. Combined with those blue floral curtains it looks like something out of "Golden Girls".
The other ocean-themed room. The master bedroom. Isn't it beatific? I had to be sure to get a picture with the ripped boarder in it to show you how intensely ghetto the room looks.
The stairwell. Lavender paint with white brush strokes. Remember doing those splatter-paint art projects when you were a kid? I hope they didn't pay this guy too much.
Seriously, how do you decorate this place? The wallpaper speaks for itself. I've tried hanging a few pictures but I'm having major reservations in some rooms. I just have to pretend the wallpaper isn't there. You may be wondering why I don't just paint the place? Well, I intended to in the beginning but I got some bad news. After being told by the owner before we signed the lease that I was allowed to do anything I wanted to the walls, I get a call the other day from his wife telling me that there were only three areas that I couldn't touch. The dinning room from Golden Girls, master bedroom at the beach and stairway to art class. So what's the point of painting at all? I was a little peeved to sat the least. I've had my share with stupid people lately.

What the Monkey?

The kids and I took a trip to Old Navy today. Destroy needs some school clothes before he starts preschool in a couple of weeks. If you've ever been to Old Navy you'll know that they have these big buckets of bright shiny balls right at kid's height. So we make our way back to the toddler section and the boys find the bucket of balls. So I spy some cute brown corduroys and walk over to them with the kids and balls in tow. As I turn around to make sure they were following me I see a ball bouncing away and a little girl sitting in a pristine pink stroller, with pink shades slightly ajar on her little head. A furious Dad pushing the stroller looks at me and says,

"Your kid just hit my kid in the head with a ball!" He says this to me without even checking to see if his daughter was OK, who, by the way didn't even flinch. So I tell Destroy that he needs to be careful because he just hit this little kid in the head. So Destroy proceeds to go put the ball back because he knew he had just made a mistake. I tell the man, who is still standing there, that I was sorry (in kind of a sarcastic tone, which he probably caught) and he leaves. The woman next to me who heard it all just said, "Amazing" to which I replied, "Yes, I thought we were all trying to raise our kids here". "No kidding" she says. Meanwhile I am trying to get Search into the stroller and he's really resisting. Through his screams I could hear the same man over near the ball buckets talking loudly. I go ever there and he has found an Old Navy store employee and he is pointing at Destroy who is putting the balls away. He is obviously explaining to the employee what had just happened. As I walk over the man points right at me and exclaims, "That's the mom!". The employee tells me that I can't allow my child to throw balls around (from the bucket which holds tons of bright, shiny balls right at kid's eye level). I look the employee in the eye, and I can see the man in the background, and I say, "Some of us don't have children who will just sit in the stroller". The man behind him heard me and walked away.

So with only a couple of 5T shirts I walk up to the check out with two unhappy little boys feeling like I was about to break out into sobs. The little girl's mom is up there talking to the same employee assuring him that the little girl was in fact, just fine. After this whole incident I thought of a millions things I wanted to say to the man like, "good luck with public school and soccer games". I looked for him when I went outside but I never saw him. Good thing, I probably would have run him over.

I'm still seething and it's already been a few hours. Am I alone in feeling like some people are so retarded? I completely agree with the guy that Destroy should not have thrown the ball in there, but did he really have to react like that? I know I wouldn't have. It seems that in order to raise a child it takes a whole community, but with people like this around I feel very alone in raising my kids.

Here's a funny link of a mom in a store with her kids. Be sure to read the description too!http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=130144061675

Puke Happens

You know the part in "The Sandlot" where the kids go on that ride at the fair and start puking all over the place? Now imagine that instead of orange puke, it was pink puke and imagine that I was under the ride getting puked on. Because, aside from being on the ride and all the kids, that's what happened last night. I have been puked on a lot in my life, and any of you who know Destroy knows that he has a puking habit, but this was by far the worst that I've ever witnessed. The picture doesn't even do it justice.

So there we are, Search and Destroy and I (Aaron was at work), me sitting next to Destroy who was standing above me. He tells me nonchalantly that he's feeling sick. Right as I was about to suggest going into the bathroom, he gets the I'm-not-feeling-so-well look on his face which is followed by a large amount of projectile vomit all over me. Then on the floor, then on the floor again. Of course he had consumed a bucket load of red and orange juice drinks and Popsicles today at the park so the puke stained the carpet. I sat there stunned, not knowing what to do first because the vomit was all over my face, arms, legs and clothes and Destroy was crying. I had to hurry and shower off while yelling at the kids not to get near the puke area. I really wished Aaron had been there to help, but mostly so that he could have taken a picture of me.

Marlo and Jamieson's visit

Last weekend we were lucky enough to have Marlo, Jamieson and Noelle come and stay for a visit. Marlo and I were crazy roommates at BYU, bleached pixie hair and all. Maybe I'll post pictures some day but I'll have to ask Marlo first. They only got to stay for one night since they were on their way to Iowa but it was fun to see them and their adorable baby.

Harry Potter Wizard Challenge

Test your wizard knowledge here.
Thanks, Aisha!

Aaron's Birthday

Aaron's birthday was last week so we took a jaunt down to the Indiana State Fair. I brought my camera in hopes to do some mullet hunting, but I was strangely disappointed. I only saw two mullets the whole time and they weren't even picture worthy. Bummer. But, the night was not a total loss. We did get to try some roasted corn and homemade corndogs, both of which were extremely fattening and delicious. We spent the last of our cash, a fortune I might add, on the big pink slide to appease the kids. We did not have enough money to try any of the variety of fried foods. Personally, I don't how a fried snickers could taste good. Maybe next year.















Meg and Destroy





















Aaron and Search















The parade. Of tractors. Probably more than 50.
















We spent all our cash. Nuts.
















Yes, that's a corn on her head.